It surprises me how even though I was super open about it, one of my biggest and longest struggles is so easily forgotten. I mean I get it. It was MY life not his or hers and they have plenty of things on their mind now. But even some of my closest friends who walked it and hugged me as I cried have said things like “oh yeah I forgot” when it’s come up lately.
If you forgot or if you just weren’t around back then I’m talking about getting/having Teddy my little boy. It was a journey. It started with a miscarriage and then years of living life in two week cycles of trying and being heartbroken that we weren’t pregnant. It was lots of doctors visits. Being poked and prodded and what can only be described as being bone weary. If you’ve dealt with infertility you know what I mean. It is exhausting. I have NOT forgotten.
But we know how the story ends with a sassy little boy who gets assaulted with hundreds of kisses a day. Who still doesn’t really sleep but who couldn’t make me feel any more Thankful, Grateful, and Blessed. The hidden (or in my case ‘forgotten’) struggle is something that’s been really on my mind lately. Whether it’s infertility like in my case or some other struggle I’ve really been thinking about how we just don’t know the whole story. I feel like with social media and memes and the endless judgey news stories it’s become the norm to take for granted the different paths we’ve all traveled and where many of us have come from.
I see images of seemingly “perfect” family moments on Instagram or wherever and it’s hard on those days that you’re flailing to keep your head above water or those of you who were like me a few years ago just wanted a baby of my own not to compare and be jealous. And this is not one of those “people should show us the bad” posts because guys I LIKE TO SEE THE GOOD. I mean I don’t mind honesty and a peek at the bad but I like to focus on what’s going right and what we can celebrate because I believe even when things are the worst and the lowest there is always something to be thankful and grateful for.
So happy Teddy has his cousins!
I am in a phase of life that is every easy for me to FEEL Thankful and Grateful and Blessed. That hard journey is still very fresh on my mind. It’s there every time someone asks if we’re going to have another baby (which they do ALL.THE.TIME). It’s there like a relative to PTSD telling me I don’t think I could ever go through the “trying” again regardless of whether I could handle the lack of sleep starting all over with a newborn. I know this is totally rambly but I just hope when you see me share my happy moments with my little guy that you know that I KNOW how crazy blessed I am and I seriously appreciate it so much. Even when I’m whining about him endlessly trying to pick my moles or not sleeping, I love him so crazy much.
And if you’re not in a phase of life where you FEEL it all the time I hope you can reason it with your brain. I remember some nights laying down and having to reminding myself to be thankful for the family I did have, my nieces, a warm bed, a warm shower, that I made enough money that I could order soda with dinner or buy popcorn at the movies. That lots of people didn’t have those things that I took for granted. That I didn’t always have all of those things. That’s part of what really drew me into this shirt from Cents of Style I feel like it really captured this niggling in the back of my head and heart. This crazy appreciation for where I have been and where I am now.
If you are feeling the same or if you feel like you need a concrete reminder that even though you might not feel it right now that you know you are still blessed and have things to be grateful and thankful for it’s a good day to shop at Cents of Style. Today for their Fashion Friday they are giving away one of these cute shirts for FREE with every order of $25 or more.
I thought it would be fun to share what YOU are thankful for. I honestly would love you to leave a comment with your own story so I can read it.